My First Experience As A Caregiver

It was over 30 years ago when I had my first experience as a caregiver. I was in my early twenties, had just started working for a new employer, the woman who was training me became my new friend who soon lost her apartment so I convinced my boyfriend to allow her to move in with us temporarily until she could save money to get her own place. All of this happened in a month's time.

A few weeks after she moved in I took her to the hospital for an outpatient surgical procedure. The next day she called me at work complaining that she was experiencing severe pain, I told her I would get someone to fill-in for me and that I was on my way to the house. By the time I arrived she began to hemorrhage profusely, my adrenalin kicked in, realizing the importance of quickly assessing a situation, remaining calm and level-headed. I immediately reached for every towel I could find, wrapped the hemorrhaging area of her body and without any delay very carefully got her into my car and rushed her to the emergency room.

Your care is our priority

I drove like I was driving an ambulance very carefully going through every red light while laying on the horn all the way to the hospital, fortunately we got there safely. I pulled right up to the front door and just continued to lay on the horn.

The next thing I knew, a team of nurses and doctors were right there removing my friend from the car and rushing her into the emergency room to evaluate her situation. The nurses and doctors quickly realized that she had been a patient just a day before this episode. Then the doctor on duty at the ER made a quick assessment that she would need surgery immediately to stop the hemorrhaging. It turned out that the doctor, who had performed the surgery, had left an instrument inside of her. This was the cause of the hemorrhage. Needless to say her doctor never responded to any of the phone calls in regard to this terrible situation.

The doctors in surgery were able to remove the instrument and stop the hemorrhaging. Thank God.

Hospital care

My friend had a two day stay before coming home after this fiasco. For the next two weeks I was her in-home care provider which required taking one week of unpaid absence from work; she was my friend in need of help, I was the only person she felt comfortable enough to provide care.

My normal week consisted of going to work and coming home, on evenings when my boyfriend was home he had my dinner prepared or we would go out to dine and enjoy each other's company. When he was away on business trips, I would have dinner with a friend, go to a movie, spend time with my dogs... Now I have a dependent, someone who needs my care from morning until evening. My first experience of being a care provider, I had no children, and before this the only similarity to routinely providing care was caring for my dogs. This experience took me to a whole new level; it put a new meaning in life for me. It made me feel like a parent taking care of her sick child.

Her care required a few routine necessities such as making sure that she took her medication on time, the most effective method was to create a chart which we could both monitor. She felt a bit weak for the first few days, so it was necessary for me to assist her getting in and out of bed and maintaining her personal care; she needed assistance dressing, undressing and showering. It was also important that she not stay in bed all day, so I encouraged and helped her take short walks around my house throughout the day when she felt up-to it.

Loving caregiver

I prepared her meals daily which included a variety of fresh vegetables, fruits, lean meat and fish, oh my goodness, cooking meals on a regular basis, is this me? Reflections of my childhood arouse as the days passed, my mother took meticulous care of me whenever I was ill. So I found pleasure in being able to provide all the comforts she needed just as my mother had provided for me. We watched movies, talked about work and though I enjoyed this experience of providing care for my friend, we looked forward to the day we could return to our normal activities.

There were times in the day that I needed to take care of some personal things but I put those things on hold, I made sure that my friend's needs came before mine because providing care for her was the priority.

The second week was different I returned to work because she was able to do more for herself and was feeling better. Later that week I had to take off again to take her to the follow up doctor's appointment. Although things were returning to some since of normalcy they were not totally normal, each evening I prepared her lunch and snacks for the next day, each morning I prepared breakfast for the two of us but again I enjoyed doing this for my friend.

I called her several times a day to check on her to make sure she had taken her medication, eaten the meals that I prepared the day before and to see how she was getting along. Had I actually become a caregiver?

Being a caregiver is a serious profession and is not to be taken lightly. Patient care should take precedence over answering your cell phone, watching your favorite soap opera or taking that cigarette break. Caregivers have to remember the first rule of thumb your patient comes first. Is there a caregiver hidden within you?